coffee reads

Lightbulb


When I was young, Nanay used to bring me to the mall or to any stores out there, and I always let her buy me something. A stroll at the supermarket should have something for me to get before leaving. In short, the stuff I had an interest in, should be bought, or otherwise, I will be sad upon going home.


When I age, and time passed, especially these times, I realize that mentality should not be happening anymore. The thought of wanting something should not always be something to fight over and have it as soon as I started having an interest in it.

I’ve noticed that that is a metaphor of what we, people feel, however this time, not on stuff and or any materials anymore, but to people. Think of this world as a whole lot of a mall, or of a supermarket, and the things that are being displayed there are explicit, so beautiful, so adoring people. Imagine that these are the people you’re being with every day. Some maybe are people you just met in the school’s hallway. Your friends. Your classmates. Your family. Your neighbors. Your church-mates. These people are being displayed on the shelves based on their classifications.


…and then, there is one shelf there where it holds someone. That is the person you met that kind of impact you as a human. Like that kind of someone that literally ate the whole milky way galaxy (I am exaggerating but that is a metaphor). Okay, let’s get it straight. That special someone. Of course, we have to be aware that they don’t know we call them special, because we are the ones observing them on that shelf, and they don’t know we are sighting them for quite a long time now, hoping we could get them and bring them home.

To carry the metaphor further, I had the chance to see and know someone whose wit and personality I consider as incandescent. Incandescent in a way that lights up when it speaks. Incandescent in the sense of giving words of wisdom that truly are making sense. TRULY, it is making sense. Incandescent in the form of considering himself as broken, yet not knowing all along, he is eventually fixing someone’s jigsaw puzzle. I want to call him ‘lightbulb’.

A lightbulb is of course giving light. Its primary purpose is to sustain light in a dim room. Merriam Webster tells us that lightbulb is, “one in which a filament gives off light when heated to incandescence by an electric current”. This ‘lightbulb comes in the season where I needed it. Not that big need tho, but this ‘lightbulb’ honestly must’ve gotten flowing electric current enough that lighted a part of me.


You know when you met someone that is not dangerous when you know their impact is making you a better person. I hate to say it, but ‘lightbulb’ does that for once in my life. I’ve always been the one who wants to inspire people and make their lives better, but this time, the tide changed. He makes me a better person in an aspect that will always help me to survive earthly life. There, I finally felt the feeling of how beautiful it is to be inspired by a thing or of someone.


Have I lost you about the ‘mall thing?’, haha. Okay, let’s go back to that. Think as if this ‘lightbulb’ is the stuff I have been looking at for some quite a long time now on that particular store’s shelf. Of course, I want it. I want it in a way that helps me. It drives me to be happy even it is only in the simplest thing. I have always been wanting it. In fact, I like it. But I can’t easily say to my Nanay to get that ‘lightbulb’, pay it to the cashier and bring it home, because “I like and I want it and need it.” No, it’s not that easy. The stuff is pretty different from people. Because people are priced higher than any material things out there. And on my part, I don’t have that capability to pay for ‘lightbulb’s’ price.

It is priceless in a way that I can only look at it for the rest of my remaining time in the mall of life. On a further metaphorical message, it is within the lightbulb’s nature to give light, right? And it also has a negative part which if I’ll hold it with all those electric currents, I’ll be harmed. I have learned a lesson today while my cousin and I were walking on the street, that my ‘lightbulb’ obsession is pretty ideal already that it saddens me not to really have it for myself.

This lightbulb thing itself teaches me that ‘lightbulb’ only came to a time in my life to sparkle light in the most needed dim part of my journey.

second semester of college (2019-2020)


I know now that he is a ‘lightbulb’ himself because I can only look at him, but can’t touch and hold him. I can only observe him like the one in our ceiling, but can’t get him out there. I can only have an advantage of his sparkle and light by remembering the words he used to speak, regardless of how short of the time it was. He is like the one that we crossed ways in one of those busy streets, stopped for a while, and say, ‘hello’. The ones we met in the morning to vaporize in the night, and to me, I am fine with that. My cousin told me that he may be coming to inspire, and that’s all there is.


When I was young, my heart was sad when I couldn’t buy things that I want, but when I grow up, and as far as people are a concern, I realize that I don’t really need to have them for myself and people, yes, couldn’t really be bought after all even how much, how much we long for their presence.

Yet, I am happy to realize that God is SO good to have let me experienced such ‘lightbulb’ phenomena that I just imagined in one of those books I’ve read and in the movies I’ve watched. A soul like that is pretty existent, after all. Perhaps the people you want will never be yours, but think of a particular impact you’ve found in them that makes you a better person, and stick with that.

(To you who seems to ate the whole milky way galaxy)




That ‘lightbulb’ will never be mine or maybe at some point it will. Perhaps it’s already being owned by someone out there, but the light he has shared and its incandescence will be forever mine to keep.


…and with that, I am forever grateful.

Forever and always,

Kryzylle Nicole



hebrews 11:16

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